If You Have Found Love

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Finding My Way Home

Today my angels took me home.  Home to my parish.  I felt as if the sermon was being directed at me.  Why is it that when I was at my lowest I gave up on the one who gives me strength.  There is so much love and peace when you speak to the one who watches over you and believes in you and pushes you forward no matter how difficult it gets to maneuver the road ahead.  Yet I have let the ones who hurt me and struck me down over and over take power over me and lead me away from him.  I search my soul for the strength to keep fighting and look only onto my spiritual guide for the road that will lead me to everlasting love and tranquility.

My Journey Through Hell And Back

My hell began 18 years ago when I began to work for a small family owned business.  When I say “family” owned, I mean owned by people who were related but wanted nothing to do with each other.  A typical work day included not only the day to day business transactions but it also meant you had to deal with personal “family” arguments in the middle of the day or people throwing objects around whle in the midst of a tantrum.  Yes, these people were considered adults.  No one ever got a pat on the back for work well done, but the minute you made a mistake you wished you were dead.  For the next week or so you would be reminded what an unprofessional idiot you were.  Why I stayed, well I am a mother of 3 and I have always been good at resolving issues.  So I decided to make it my project to turn this “family” around and make them respect and honor each other.  Yeah, that really worked… not.  For while my advise was being accepted and all was well for the moment, my back was being stabbed by so many knives I don’t know how I walked out of there each day.  So, I decided to take a stand and demand respect and although they would not change their behaviour towards eachother I was not going to put up with it.  And now my hell is hotter and deeper than I ever thought possible.  I have been through, experienced and felt so much hurt, pain and anguish that I am numb to everyday life.  Why in a world with so much to offer, so many needy people and so many wars do we have to behave so horribly that we lose our respect for humanity, and have no morrals.  Hell is something I always feared as a child and someone once told me that life was truly purgatory.  I never believed them until now.  We have created our own hell and we feed it with all of our materialistic wants and needs.  We have lost touch with reality, people don’t matter, they are a means for us to get what we need.  How do we climb out of this deep dark abyss without losing it all……..

 

 

Angels Hear My Prayer

Once again, I call on my angels.  I need strength and guidance in my quest for a new treatment for my husband.  While my heart is open and my soul is hopeful I know I cannot do this alone.  It is only through prayer and spiritual guidance that I can find inner peace.  May the angels be showered with   petals of roses as they seek out a small miracle.

Searching for My “Self”

Searching for My "Self".

LESSONS LEARNED

LESSONS LEARNED.